Entering discernment counseling can be a daunting step, especially if you’re worried that your spouse might use the process—and the support of the therapist—as a way to justify leaving you. It’s natural to have concerns about the outcome of such a deeply personal and potentially life-changing process. In this blog, we’ll explore whether your spouse can use discernment counseling to leave you and how the role of the therapist plays into this complex situation.
Understanding the Purpose of Discernment Counseling
Discernment counseling is designed to help couples who are ambivalent about their relationship’s future. The process is focused on helping both partners gain clarity and confidence in making a decision about whether to stay together and work on the marriage or to move toward separation or divorce. The key here is that the counseling process is about exploring all options, not pushing one particular outcome.
The Therapist’s Role in Discernment Counseling
A therapist in discernment counseling is a neutral facilitator whose primary goal is to help both partners express their feelings, concerns, and desires openly and honestly. The therapist is not there to take sides or to support one partner’s decision over the other’s. Instead, they guide the couple through a process of reflection and exploration, ensuring that both partners’ voices are heard and respected.
Can My Spouse Use Discernment Counseling to Justify Leaving?
While it’s possible that your spouse might reach the conclusion during discernment counseling that separation is the best option for them, the process itself is not designed to encourage one particular outcome. Instead, it helps both partners arrive at a decision that feels right for them, based on a thorough exploration of their feelings and the state of the relationship.
If your spouse is already leaning toward leaving, discernment counseling can provide a structured environment for them to explore those feelings more deeply. However, it also offers the opportunity for you to express your own concerns and hopes for the relationship. The therapist’s role is to ensure that the process is fair and that both partners have the chance to fully explore their options.
Please know that the consultation process allows for the therapist to ask questions to each partner to help identify if either have made a decision. If either partner is found to make a solid decision to leave the marriage or relationship, the therapist may offer other options of support and share the discernment may not be the best option.
The Importance of Honest Communication
One of the central goals of discernment counseling is to foster honest communication between partners. If your spouse is considering leaving, this process allows them to express those feelings openly, but it also gives you the space to share your perspective. Through this open dialogue, the hope is that both partners can come to a mutual understanding of what is best for each of them and the relationship.
Discernment Counseling Is Not About Taking Sides
It’s important to remember that discernment counseling is not about the therapist supporting one partner’s decision over the other’s. The therapist’s role is to facilitate a balanced discussion where both partners can explore their feelings and concerns. This neutrality ensures that the decision reached is one that reflects the true desires of both partners, rather than the influence of one over the other.
What If My Spouse Decides to Leave?
If, during the discernment counseling process, your spouse decides that leaving the relationship is the best option for them, it’s important to recognize that this decision is theirs to make. However, discernment counseling can also help you prepare for that possibility by providing a supportive environment where you can process your feelings, consider your next steps, and receive guidance on how to manage the transition.
Conclusion
While it’s possible that your spouse might decide to leave during the discernment counseling process, the process itself is not designed to push one outcome over another. The therapist’s role is to ensure that both partners have the opportunity to explore their feelings, concerns, and options in a balanced and respectful manner.
Discernment counseling in Houston,Tx and online in Texas California, Georgia, and Florida can help bring difficult feelings to the surface, but it gives both partners the chance to express your own desires for the relationship. Ultimately, the decision to stay together or part ways should be a mutual one, made with full awareness and understanding of what each partner truly wants.
Discernment counseling can be a challenging process, but it also offers the potential for clarity and resolution—whether that means working on the relationship or moving forward separately. Contact us today to start your consultation.
