Have You Been Hurt By Someone You Trusted?
Do you have a hard time maintaining healthy, satisfying relationships?
Have you experienced the pain of neglect, abandonment, abuse, or betrayal?
As a result, do you feel more comfortable when you emotionally detach or engage in surface-level relationships, despite wanting to connect?
No matter how hard you try to overcome past wounds, you may have lost your capacity to trust yourself and others. This naturally impacts your self-esteem and ability to be intimate. As you feel more and more unworthy of genuine love and acceptance, you are likely to experience intense anger, sadness, fear, and loneliness.
You May Be Holding Onto Unresolved Attachment Wounds From Childhood
Trauma often occurs in childhood, with many of us having survived abuse, neglect, or attachment injuries with our caregivers. As children, we may have felt scared, helpless, and out of control in these situations, thus developing protective coping strategies that may have become unhealthy over time. Trauma typically gets stored in the body, resulting in symptoms of fear, panic, hypervigilance, and anxiety even long after the traumatic experience has taken place.
If we were betrayed or hurt by a loved one more recently—as might be the case with infidelity or racial trauma—it’s possible to revert back to these same trauma responses we developed as children. Even if we rationally know that we are safe, our body remains in stress mode, causing chest tightness, trouble breathing, insomnia, and general feelings of discomfort.
All of us yearn to feel secure and satisfied in our relationships, but for many, trauma has complicated our ability to connect and stay present. Fortunately, counseling is a meaningful way to address core traumas and develop new coping strategies. At Unload It Therapy, our clinicians can help you learn to trust again.
Traumatic Experiences Are More Common Than You Might Think
Culturally speaking, trauma is often considered a big, catastrophic event that puts our lives in danger. Examples of such traumas might include assaults/attacks (both verbally and physically), natural disasters, near-death experiences, and community violence (including police brutality). And while these experiences can certainly trigger a traumatic response, many other common human experiences also fall under the umbrella of trauma.
Trauma encapsulates a wide range of situations in which we feel out of control, unprepared, or in danger. Despite not being abjectly life-threatening, any form of childhood neglect or abuse—including mental, physical, emotional, and sexual abuse—can be traumatic, as is any form of betrayal in adulthood. We are left with unhealed wounds whenever the attachment between ourselves and a loved one is severed through a harmful act.
Some Communities Are More Susceptible To Trauma Than Others
Furthermore, attachment ruptures can take place on a systemic level. Those of us in marginalized communities—including people of color, women, and LGBTQIA+ folks—are more likely to be put in harm’s way due to the systems that continue to perpetuate discrimination, violence, and a lack of protection. This kind of deep-seated trauma tends to span generations, which is why family elders often continue the cycle of abuse, neglect, or rejection that was modeled to them.
When we look at trauma from this perspective, we can begin to see the phenomenon as much more widespread than we think and that many of our peers are struggling with the same hurt. Yet, instead of connecting over shared wounds or addressing the unhealthy coping behaviors that resulted from feeling unsafe in the past, we are likely to avoid or numb our pain.
Therapy offers you a chance to tackle your trauma head-on. By working with a trusted therapist who can help you adjust your attachment style to feel more secure, you can escape the cycle of distress that is keeping you stuck and unsatisfied.
Trauma Counseling At Unload It Therapy
For many trauma survivors, the narrative of our trauma has been written for us, making us feel guilty, ashamed, and somehow to blame for what happened. In the safe space of counseling, we can stop, identify where discomfort and negative beliefs stem from, and create new strategies for feeling safe and secure.
Our Approach
While trauma treatment is always individualized to meet the needs of each client, your therapist is likely to spend a lot of time in counseling getting to know your unique attachment style. By looking into your early models for relationships and the connections you have to those who have hurt you, your therapist will help you understand how certain interpersonal patterns have developed over time. With this knowledge, you can adjust your emotional response and create new, healthier boundaries.
Our approach to trauma treatment draws from a wide range of counseling methods designed to enhance self-awareness and coping skills. Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) allows clients to better understand their emotional blueprints as they grasp the impact that trauma has had on their lives. And Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a highly effective PTSD treatment that resolves and redirects trauma out of the brain. In addition, we have Christian counselors on staff who are happy to take a spiritual approach to matters of religious trauma on request.
With the help and support you receive at Unload It Therapy, you can learn to manage the strong emotions that have accompanied your trauma over the years. Instead of feeling stuck and hopeless, we can equip you with life-changing coping strategies that will ultimately enhance your quality of life.
Common Questions About Trauma-Informed Therapy…
What exactly is trauma?
At Unload It Therapy, we view trauma as any experience from your life that has caused you deep pain and/or to respond in a way that does not positively serve you. Trauma can result from a wide range of experiences, including childhood abuse and neglect, death, an accident, assault, or a significant life transition. Any time you become distressed to the point of being regularly dysregulated, it’s likely that unresolved trauma is at the root of your pain.
My trauma isn’t “bad” enough to warrant treatment.
No matter the core experience, trauma can wreak emotional, mental, and physical havoc on our lives. Even “normal” or “minor” experiences like a breakup or move can trigger a trauma response.
If you’re hurting, you deserve to feel better. A therapist can help you develop new coping strategies and model a healthy, trusting connection that will allow you to create strong boundaries and heal other attachment wounds from your life.
My trauma happened so long ago—how can therapy help me?
If you have spent years, even decades, trapped in the cycle of trauma, we applaud you for showing up and wanting to do something about it. It’s understandable that you would have concerns about addressing deep-seated trauma from your past, but your therapist can be a knowledgeable, empathetic, and effective guide throughout your healing journey. Our approach to therapy can meaningfully resolve trauma at its core.
Keep in mind that if you struggle with childhood trauma or Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD) as a result of multiple accumulating experiences, therapy may take some time. However, we are committed to your healing for the long haul and will support you every step of the way.
Learn To Feel Safe Again
If you have been abandoned, rejected, abused, or hurt by someone in your life, it’s possible that unresolved trauma is at the core of your discomfort and mental health symptoms. Fortunately, the therapists at Unload It Therapy are trauma-informed, offering verified counseling methods that can help you heal. To find out more, contact us.
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